Thursday, February 20, 2014

Through the Cracks

Sometimes, one of my kids gets overlooked in the busyness of the day and my own mental to-do list.  

My Segundo fell through the cracks today. My Segundo and my Prima and my Terzo fall through the cracks a lot lately.  

And it breaks my heart a little to say that, to know that I didn't pay attention to them and their questions.  That I didn't ask about their day beyond my cursory question when I first picked them up from school.  I was too busy to listen, to ask, to sit with them and read a story. 

On days like today, I go to bed promising that tomorrow I will pay attention, tomorrow I will be there fully for all my children, tomorrow it will be different.

But most days it's not.  And I'm right back at the end of another day, making the same promises: that I will find a way to get all my stuff done without letting my kids fall through the cracks of another day.

Where does the time go, when you can blink and she's 7, he's 5, and he's 2?  Did it all fall through the cracks and we're just coasting by, missing out and not even realizing it?  Or, even worse, realizing it but not doing anything about it. 

This is where I am right now: I realize that I am letting the days slip through my fingers, but I'm not doing anything to slow it down.  I'm letting the stress and demands of the day interfere with playing with my children.  

And tonight I am making the same promise to do better, be better.

Linking up with Things I Can't Say